ADDRESS THE MESS

All of us have found ourselves in a mess one or two (maybe three) times in our lives. How we handled it shows lots about OUR character or lack of…). Whatever the case may be we have options and the option we choose will be how we tell the story in the future. (Depending who you are will depend on where and how you tell the story). The conclusion of the matter is the way we go down in history. We are creating a legacy. Conversely, that is why I want to make better choices of the future messes I find myself in.
My mind went back this morning to the time I was so bored/uncomfortable/miserable almost to the point of depression at my work place. Talking to my managers fell on deaf ears. I decided to take my matter to the TOP, yes, to the Commissioner (after we had established a rapport) and in less than 30 days I was transferred to another office. Since nobody knew how I arrived at this office, and everybody wanted to know how and why the Commissioner would be involved in my transfer, and I wasn’t telling. The office I was transferred to did not want me there as I was the only Black with the position I filled. He said he had enough diversity in his office (one Native American Indian, one Hispanic, two Blacks and one Chinese) and he was not happy having another Black in his office. One of his supervisors were Black, she took me out to lunch and told me the story that he was out to get me, to write me up even if I sneezed, etc. and she reminded me, “you are NOT welcomed here!” I thanked her and I knew this was the Lord and I and I would have to draw from my Miss Weaver experience (another story) and I knew the same God that brought me thru that would be here for me in this situation. I made up my mind the boss of the office was the BOSS – hands down! He was such a rude, disrespectful man, but he was the BOSS!
He did many things to me to push my buttons, as well as the other employees, (that’s okay, I’m good)! One day I went on break and the room was filled with all Caucasians, I guess he wanted to show off.  As I walked in room, he yelled at me, “Get back on that desk, you can’t have a break, get on back up front – NOW! (Remember, he is BOSS), therefore, I smiled and said, oh okay, went back up front to call my next claimant.  He came up front, apologizing to me and said, “Everyone in the break room said I was wrong, you have not had a break, so go on break.” “No, that’s okay, I don’t need a break, I LOVE my job.” Other things he tried but I didn’t participate in his childish tactics and one day he talked to me and told me he was going to move to California, and he had been so evil and mean to me and would I forgive him. Later I was made the employee of the month with flowers and special parking place; and a few years later promoted to a position I never wanted but the money was good and that position I loved most of all my government service.
Recently, I went to a young woman in leadership, shared with her lots of her skills sets and added one she thought she was doing well, but not measuring up to the position by her behavior/attitude or her leadership style. I love this young wonderful woman, and just wanted to share some observations with her, after I did, I asked her if she wanted to share anything with me, she said two things which I helped her recall what went on in those situations, and encouraged her to feel free to speak truth to me at that time as I was doing with her – In love. I talked to her as she was my daughter. I left feeling we had a good chat. Until half way home I received a text something to the fact she was erasing me from everything she had my name on, etc. My final comment was, “You have the last word – I will walk in love.” Months and days later many references from folks came back to me that she made, some were true and most untrue. Each time someone told me what she had said about the incident (She never used my name, but folks knew it was me. She even went to a funeral speaking of our talk). At that point I saw this was getting MESSY and you can’t clean up a mess by making a bigger mess. What’s a person supposed to do? It came to me today: Address the Mess and rise to virtue (behavior showing high moral standards) and do something no one else would do. Speak kindly of her, refer her to speak at events using her amazing skill set and sent her a generous gift at Christmas time.
I want to always choose to hold up to virtue and those digs on Face book, I don’t have to respond nor react but think good things about the person. I have much peace, after all peace is what we want and not make a MESS – Messier!  

UNFORGETTABLE – YEAH, THAT SUMS IT UP!!!

Once in a life time someone crosses your path and you know it’s a divine connection because no other way would I encounter such a phenomenal human being. (Many folks are flaky, unpredictable, transactional, etc.) Conversely, every now and then you meet someone that is genuine, honest, and full of integrity and character - the only word that can describe him is – UNFORGETTABLE.

Let me tell you about this unforgettable man: I first saw him when I arrived at my Senior exercise class here in Southfield. He looked like a movie star. He invited our senior’s class to participate in a project at Southfield Public School for a particular day and event. Of course I would volunteer as I thought it was a novel idea to have Senior Citizens to interact with young folks. There is such an exchange to be made.

On the day of the event this UNFORGETTABLE man was there, directing and interacting with others. We had a grand ole time as some of us seniors shared our lives on camera living here in Southfield. I forgot the cameras and told MY story. Later I talked to this same man on the phone when he invited me to his office about Senior Reporter – Who? Me? Senior Reporter?! (This is what my oldest daughter does). This would make her laugh out loud; as for me I will try (almost) anything once.

The first day working with this man, he showed me around Cable 15, how shows go on the air, and what he had in mind for me as Senior Reporter. He was so kind and patient with me, as learning new things does not come easy in this season of my life, but he made it fun. I enjoyed working most with him because he treated me as an equal, my opinion mattered as he would often ask me what I thought about a particular project which he is the expert. He is a real leader because what he taught me about his business I wanted to know more and more and never did I feel less than or unimportant. (I think he has a Collaborative Leadership style).

He is also a humanitarian in that one day I was supposed to meet at his office but had some testing at the hospital as they had called me to return as something didn’t look right. Went for my testing and after all was finalized I received a clean report. I was so happy about this good news I wanted to call and tell this UNFORGETTABLE man, but instead, he texted me saying he was concerned and if I wanted to talk, he wanted to listen. (How awesome is that)? In these days, people caring about people?! People they just met?! WOW!

Since that day I have had many days of just sharing what’s on my heart, i.e. religion, politics, race, etc. and he can do the same, and whether we agree or not, we respect each other’s opinion. Why am I doing a BLOG on him?! I’ll tell you why…February 17^th is his birthday and I was thinking about him as he is on vacation but wishing him a Happy Birthday so thought I would do it in a BLOG.  HAPPY BIRTHDAY MIKE TALLEY@Cable 15, you are a JOY to work with and yes, INDEED, you are an UNFORGETTABLE MAN!  HAPPY BIRTHDAY, may God bless you with many, many more!    

WHAT MAKES ME HAPPY?

While standing outside Southfield Public Library waiting for their doors to open on this cold day in February; a gentleman asked, “Why are you all smiles this morning?” First place, I didn’t know I was smiling but after pausing to think about it I reflected on the fact that I had gotten up early to enjoy breakfast with my grandson, Joshua and we made our beds as well. I had no pain in my body (always with discomfort, but in this season of life, who doesn’t?), was able to walk to library – I was on the move!
My final response was, “that’s just who I am.” We had a hearty laugh and then walking out of library said to a lady entering, “you look pretty disgusted.” “Yes, I am, I really am.” “I sure hope your day improves.” Walked home and still thinking about the comment. Why am I so happy? My final conclusion to that question today is I know who I am, I know why I am here, and I like ME. I am anchored in my faith, outside of this I have nothing that is of any real worth. I choose to make God my ultimate concern. He is the Pilot of my ship, therefore the road before me will lead to ultimate fulfillment. I am guaranteed an inheritance of infinite value. He is my chief counselor and even in the darkest of nights/days He is ready to teach and guide me as I recognize His perpetual presence.
I am happy because happiness begets happiness, as I am NEVER alone. Upon finalizing this note I have an invitation to meet with friends at a local eatery. Then I will return home, park my car and walk back to library and spread more sunshine, and receive some for myself as well.  That’s why I am happy. Why are you happy/sad/discouraged/depressed/perplexed? Sometimes we have to think about what we are thinking about – Rethink our thoughts. THAT’S ALL…

GET OVER IT

The election is over and whether we like it or not Donald Trump is the President of these United States, the greatest Nation in the history of the planet. Many likes him, and many don’t but that does not change a thing. He is the President for the next four years - at least. We can choose again after that.
Meanwhile, I encourage you to do as I do by taking care of yourself, because out of the heart flows what comes from our mouths then on to twitter/Facebook, etc. Here is what I decided to do, as I would wake up every morning turn my computer on, and he is in MY FACE… (gag me with a spoon man, as he had personally insulted me with his remarks about women). One day I felt discouraged, disappointed, and angry about some of his remarks, and he being President and knew I had to do something about it. From that day I decided I would be kind to ME and guard my thoughts but my target would be President Trump. I chose him to be the person that I would use to show kindness to. I would do this as when I saw his photo on social media I would not speak negative about him and wouldn’t entertain any negative conversations about him. I was on a mission to be KIND.
While doing this project, I also fasted and prayed lots for him, his wife, family and those who surround him.  It has been almost three weeks now since I started this and today when I turned on my computer and saw his face my heart went out to him, I have compassion for him and praying for him.  I am really praying for his wife like no other First Lady we ever had.
My heart goes out to all those on Facebook that say negative things about him, yet, I do understand and can show them mercy and grace because if I had not started this project I may be saying those things or more about him, however, in choosing to be kind to ME and President Trump I am presenting myself to the world in a kinder and gentler manner. Therefore, I can say to all those with negative comments about our current President – STOP IT and GET OVER IT!!!