I remember the time when taking a bible course, I did not like the author of books they assigned in the class and told them so, but not in a kind way. My immaturity caused me to NOT use filter, and felt I am the way I am because that’s the way I was made, I’ve got to be true to me. Everyone in the classroom cringed when I spoke, but I can only imagine they wish they had the courage to say what I said as they were thinking same thing. (They told me later)!
The Dean of the School pulled me aside and spoke to me about the issue as well as a few others matters. At first I became very defensive and wanted to blame others, but not me, I was angry and as she talked I was reloading my guns to tell her my point of view, but shortly into the conversation I heard a voice say, “LISTEN.” I Listened, I heard and received a new perspective and from that day forward I was no longer bored with the class and really got involved and enjoyed the class and have read other books by the same author, and can agree with some of his information. This changed my life, not just for that class but for other areas of my life as well.
Last week before leaving for vacation I received a phone call from a classmate of my Self Confrontation Class, who is also a Counselor (I loved that class as we definitely can’t effectively confront someone else, until we confront SELF). Conversely, I returned the call, left message. This morning I received a lengthy text from her. In this text she was chastising me for something I had forgotten about – I did NOT read the text and said, “YOU CAN MISS ME WITH ALL THIS…we need to talk.” I called early, as both of us are on the go. My friend, railed on me, yes she RAILED and I heard a voice saying, “Be quiet…LISTEN!” She talked, cried, yelled, etc. when she finished I said after I realized nothing can be accomplished by being defensive, I needed to hear HER heart, and put MYSELF in HER shoes. Therefore, I listened…then I said, “Anything else you need to say?” At that point she started laughing and said, “I think I need counseling”. (She obviously was NOT crying because her mood changed swiftly).
When the conversation was over, she vented, I listened, we decided to get together immediately 2017 for lunch/brunch and we had a hearty laugh. What I like about this was, she confronted me, told me what was on her heart; both took responsibility for our OWN actions and realized our relationship was more important than any circumstances. Moving forward I believe we will get more out of our relationship and out of – LIFE!
I am on a journey learning how to confront (and be confronted) successfully. Speaking the truth in love. After all, Jesus confronted. MORE TO COME…
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