While I was in the hospital, sicker than I ever remembers, as last year hospitalization, I do not remember most of it. I know this one thing for sure after going thru this surgery, that God's word is true, and it will work not only for me, but works for whosoever believes that it will work for them. Lots of people says I have great faith, yet, I have nothing that anyone else cannot have. Yes, not only can you have what I have, but you can have more, however, I will assure you that you must first believe that Jesus died on the cross for your sins, and raised for your justification, and is sitting on the right hand of the Father making intercessions for you and me right now, and you must believe that not only he is, but he is a rewarder of those that diligently seek him. Diligently seeking consists of not seeking him when trouble strike, but seek him in good times, seek him in bad times, seek him when it's raining and storming in your life, and seek him when the sun is shining in our lives. It is the rain that makes us appreciate the sunshine.
I also know this, that it is God's will that we know Him in the power of of His resurrection and in the fellowship of his sufferings. Man, during this hospitalization I saw that clearer than ever. Sometimes people feel when crisis comes it's because of disobedience, check your spirit and talk to God about that and he will tell you, but I do not believe from my heart of heart that my Heavenly Father would use such debilitating things as illness to get my attention, unless, that is the only way that he can get my attention. Our Heavenly Father loves us so much, that while we were yet in our sins, with no way out but by his son, Jesus, he sent his only son to die for us, to buy us back that we might have eternal life. God would that we have life, and not only life but an abundant life. I encourage any of you that may read this, if God is speaking to you, obey him no matter what, and when we do, we will know that he will never use a bed of affliction to reprove, or correct us. He speaks to us in a soft, gentle, kind voice.
As for my illness, as some asked me, while I was coming out of semi comatose state, have you asked God what have you done to bring this on yourself? I thought about Job, but I was able to tell them that this sickness was not unto death, but for the Kingdom of Heaven's sake and I would rise again, and would rise with more authority, anointing, and power than I had before, because these months and months that I experienced more pain than I have ever endured in my life time, yet while in pain, I knew that Jesus was with me, because He said he would never leave me nor forsake me. I assure you that I would have fainted unless I believed to see the goodness of the Lord in the Land of the living. I would have given up hope unless I knew God was with me. Because the Lord was with me gave me Hope, to live. You have to work hard to live, but you can give up and die. Since I have been out of the hospital since last Friday, I have tried to go walking a half block and every day thereafter would add a little more. It was extremely difficult at first, so today I got up early, and for the first time made my breakfast and went for a walk, forcing myself to do a little more, and I walked around the block. Yes, it takes effort to live, but you can do nothing and die.
Yes, God is real, and yes, Christians do suffer in these temporal bodies, and you will experience crisis and disappointments as a Born Again Christian, as it rains on the just as well as the unjust. However, I would rather go thru with Jesus than to be without him no matter what the trial is. Having obtained help from God, Honestly, I continue to this day - That's for sure!!!!!
I almost forgot to mention, that I met some of the most wonderful people while in the hospital and we are staying in touch. When I went back into hospital last Monday night, the thought came to me, that I was going back to share with someone, so when I entered the room, I looked in the next bed, and my daughter, Carletta, whispered to me, without knowing what the Lord had already said, she said, "go ahead and do what God wants you to do while you are here, so you don't have to come back." I looked at her and laughed in serous discomfort, and said, yeah, you are right!!!
All the pain and discomfort I experienced was worth meeting, Ms. Lucille, Cora , Katherine, Irene, Sally, and the other roommate I had that was fascinated with DuBois being an original Tuskegee Airman. Also, the medical staff and it's support team which thought that I was the nicest patient they ever met, as they said I came out of surgery thanking everyone for being so kind. They said they have never experienced that before, and they said no matter what, I was always smiling. Now that's news to me, as I did not even know I was smiling..
