DOES GOD GET INVOLVED IN HUMAN AFFAIRS?!? (Speech for Toastmaster 5/7/18)

Mr. Toastmaster, Fellow Toastmaster, Honored Guests, Does God Get Involved in Human Affairs, I need to know!

Naturally so I am very skeptical, raised in a Christian home, social outlet was centered on church, and my dad was a Pastor.  We were taught to say our prayers at night and say our grace before meals.  I wondered was God listening or was I speaking to the air.

One night I went to a youth fellowship and a mother of the church taught us if we ASK God, He would provide.  YEAH, RIGHT!!! She invited us to come whisper into her ear what we wanted God to do for us.  I was bold and wanted to give God something hard to do, as there were 13 children and I was the 7^th one, and seldom did we have everything we wanted.

Easter was closely approaching and we usually received a homemade dress and one pair of black patent leather shoes but I wanted more.  I wanted two pair of shoes, a pair of brown loafers and black and white oxford shoes, two store bought dresses and a spring coat. I had never had a spring coat in my entire 10 years of life.  I whispered this into her ear and forgot about it.

About a week before Easter we received a box from Chicago Illinois, we lived in Tennessee, and my Grandma would periodically send us hand me downs from my many cousins in Chicago. Well, I went outside to play, because nothing fit me anyway.  I was CHUBBY, but cute! Nothing would fit me, so let the rest of them fight over the clothes. 

To my surprise, my mother called me into house to try on a pretty dress, CHUBBY girls, never got pretty dresses, I wore a size 13 sub teen at age 10. I tried the store bought dress on and it fit like a glove, then she handed me another one.  WOW!  Then she pulled out a pair of loafers, and a pair of black and white shoes and nobody could wear them but me. Thought I would hang around a little longer, and she pulled out a spring coat and nobody wanted it but me.

Fellow Toastmasters, does God get involved in human affairs?!?

On January 6, 2018, I was homeless, devastated and felt so violated.  I arrived home and my neighbors were asking for all the containers I could find as water was coming into their homes. I complied; as I was preparing for bed I heard gushes of water coming into my home. I didn’t know what to do so I prayed. I finally called Medic Restoration Company to do damage control. My home was eventually guttered. I did end up in hotel.  One day got caught up in paper work from insurance company and I actually sat in my car but I had a peace that passed all understanding. I took care of business by phone and I noticed on that day it wasn’t as cold as the other days.

One day while in hotel room, looking out the window at the snow, rain, and sleeting I had a grateful heart. I was just grateful to have any roof over my head and my basic needs met, but I still felt homeless so I prayed, Lord, if I was home right about now I would have a hot pot of soup and hot cornbread.  A few minutes later a knock on the door, a person brought me my favorite soup and hot cornbread.

One Sunday I had to get up early, clean car off; didn’t realize how blessed I was as first time in 20 years have to clean car off, I have a garage. Had to stay late for church and I was exhausted and I knew I was not going to stop for food.  As I drove I asked God for a home cooked meal and started laughing.  Had no idea how I was going to get a home cooked meal, but that was not my problem, I was asking.  When I got to hotel room received a phone call: “Ms. Ernestine, what hotel are you? I have some homemade food for you and I’m bringing it over.”  What?! Wow!!! Come on over!  

Fellow Toastmasters, you are young, wise, intelligent and professional, please tell me, Did God get involved in MY affairs – or was it a coincidence?  YOU DECIDED!!!

SEXUAL HARASSMENT/ASSAULT

I am dumbfounded that intelligent people are surprised that sexual harassment and assault is a THING…NOW!  That has always been an issue with rich/powerful men.  It was a power play and nobody would believe the woman, therefore they kept it bottled up inside.
As far back at the late 50’s I was sexually assaulted and I was very young. When I tried to tell someone I was told if I didn’t keep that and take it to the grave with me I would break up that man’s family and you don’t want to break up someone’s family do  you?  (Putting the blame on me and not the perpetrator)! I kept it until I couldn’t keep it any longer and I told. I also had a game plan, at age 11, told the wife if her husband came in a certain way, I could tell how he closed the door, I would go out the back door. If she saw her dishes unwashed, it was because of her husband’s action. He eventually stopped, not before he scolded me, and I said, yes sir, and in my heart, “keep your hands to yourself”.
Later when I was older and no longer afraid of the mighty powerful men, while working in Government, I asked this man to come to the supply room after one of his attempts, he did, I blocked the door to keep anyone else from coming in, and asked him point blank: What is it I am doing that makes you THINK I am interesting in what you have in mind?  Whatever it is, please tell me so I can change, and I am obviously sending out the wrong message. I further told him, I was not interested, I would not tell anyone else of his behavior, but if he ever approached me again, on the spot I would scream – RAPE! (Which is another power play – rape has nothing to do with sex, but POWER). He never approached me again and we interacted professional after that.
He was on his death bed and sent for me, he didn’t know how to apologize, that was the best he could do. I accepted that, took someone else with me and prayed with him and asked had he made his peace with God. He said he had. GOOD!
I just heard today with all the sexual harassment/assaults the women must be playing a part. HUH?!? HOW?!? A woman should be able to walk down the street naked because a man should demonstrate self-control, and in charge of his OWN behavior.  Saying SORRY does not make it better, only CHANGE does.

THANKSGIVINGS

I no longer cook large meals for Thanksgivings, or any other time, but this year since I wasn’t traveling, thought I would prepare and take to my daughter’s house, but they were under the weather. All this food in my house, so I prayed and the Lord told me to go ahead cook anyway. (I did give away the turkey). I pulled out my Mom’s old serving platters off the shelf, cooked the night before with great JOY, and sensed the presence of my Mom. Remembering, how she would put extra in the pot in case a stranger stopped by.
I did not invite anyone, but asked the Lord to send whosoever He wanted here and I set the table for four. I got a call where someone asked could they come over, I said yes. Received a text another person asked could they come. The last one didn’t have a ride to get here, and that setting was still on the table when he showed up yesterday and ate like a king.
Thanksgiving Day we had an amazing time sharing why we are grateful. One lady from India shared prayer in her native language and of course I added in Jesus name. She interpreted the prayer and in Jesus name was appropriate. We played a game where we could share our authentic thoughts.  Afterwards, they called saying it was the best Thanksgiving ever and Anju called India, California, Illinois and other places to share her first Thanksgivings ever in America.
I went to sleep that night just being thankful for the faithfulness of my Heavenly Father and realize that gratitude is the antidote for any negative emotion.  2017 was the BEST THANKSGIVING – EVER!!!

GRIEF IS NO JOKE – IT’S ALSO A PART OF LIVING

Upon returning home Sunday night from school reunion, made it a point to go immediate to the hospital to see DuBois.  Upon arrival his sons were in the room all solemn and sad and at that point I knew if I had anything to say, I had to say it now.  After greeting them, looking at DuBois lying there what appeared to be a vegetative state, I asked them was their next step. The oldest one there said he had one in mind but didn’t want to say and the other one said if I had a ranch house he could come live with me. I asked for permission to express my thoughts and they welcomed them.
I said, for sure no matter what, he can’t return to his apartment and it’s not a good idea for him to live with you all, as he does not want to live with his children.  He has money, get him the best of care his money can afford so you all can go on with your lives.  The most loving thing you can do for your dad is to get someone that is skilled to care for him.  They agreed. The oldest one asked to see me outside the room, and expressed his gut level feelings and I was totally in agreement.
I asked them if I could speak to their Dad privately, and they said yes, and I spoke into DuBois ear, and said what I wanted him to know, and he started to move around, nurse came in to do some adjustments, I asked her if I was in the way and she said no way, I am glad that he is responding with any movement. I prayed for him and left.
I drove home, felt great about my visit, pulled up to the garage, and Holy Spirit said, “He’s dying.” “Dying?!”  “God can you raise him back up just one more time?” I came into house, went to my prayer closet as my heart was hurting, and made my request known to the only true and living God. God lifted that heavy burden. Next time I visited DuBois, he was talking and moving around, and I was shocked and stood in the door looking – SHOCKED! Carol, his daughter in law was there, and I got in his face and asked him if he knew me, he said no, I don’t know you, I said, do you know Ernestine, he said, yes I know Ernestine, would you pray for me in his weak frail voice. “Of course, DuBois I will pray for you, that’s what I do.” Afterward, I read his get well cards, and it was awkward, because I knew he was dying. Yet, I read.
Following Monday while getting up very early got news he had passed away. I was called before key members of family were notified and they asked me to stand by to help them walk with them thru this shadow of death, I promised I would. A week later we funeralized him and he was buried in National Cemetery in Holly, Michigan.  Family insisted that I have a part in the program of the funeral and the burial. I am still amazed at the faithfulness of God as I read the cards and said a poem that God dropped in my heart, This too shall pass…tears in eyes of the guests, and folks meeting me in the hallway asking for my cards and would I come to speak at Dr. Martin Luther King day.  WOW!
I am grateful for my church family that came alone with me to drive me, and keep me focused for the task at hand. I am grateful for the Ross family for their love and kindness to me during this time and afterward.  Many have been in touch with me and some of the younger airmen have called, wanting to make sure I am alright and asking me out to lunch.  All I can say is I am grateful.
I am so happy those time I felt overwhelmed with DuBois, how God always reminded me, don’t be weary in well doing, for you will reap if you faint not.  I am reaping the benefits of my labor.     

2017 FRAZIER HIGH SCHOOL REUNION

I was honored to have my son attend my 55th school reunion with me.  He was the best dressed man in the entire building. I felt like a million dollars to have my son there, taking a photo with him.  Also, other classmates wanted to take a photo with him as well. They all say he is a mighty fine young man.
I loved the hotel I stayed in as well, it was being remodeled but I can only imagine what a great place it will become.  I plan on checking back with them sometime in January and maybe return to visit.
The reunion was held in Baltimore and I met some new people while there. I am also happy that I took the advice of my son and just go and interact with other folks, as they didn’t seem to be very friendly, but Timothy said, but you just be yourself and they be themselves.  I did exactly that, went up and asked folks for their names, as I recognized only a hand full, and as we interacted we knew each other or at least someone in our families.  It was the best reunion I have ever attended.  It will be here next year.  I only hope I can attend.
I met a lady in the breakfast area of the hotel, we talked, laughed and agreed to meet the next day. I always bring up Jesus Christ and I noticed her piggy back on what I was saying but she never said anything about the Lord Jesus.  Yet, I enjoyed the exchange. We connected to each other as we shared about our children.  Next day she did return as planned, sent her husband down first, and then came with a friend.  I noticed how they were checking me out, which was okay with me because if I have nothing to hide, I hide nothing.
I talked to the folks she brought down, we enjoyed each other and as we were leaving, her guests left first as she continued to talk to me, and it was something how she covered her head that I asked if she was cold, or why was her head covered?  She said, I am covered because I am Muslim but I didn’t want you to know until I had connected with you. At that point I said, thank you for sharing and I enjoyed our conversation and I am so happy to meet you.  I learned so much from that encounter that I will put in practice for the future.
My reunion was held the end of September and riding on the bus back home, we had so much fun.  I received a phone call that my friend, DuBois, was in the hospital and I responded I was on my way back home and would be in touch. 
We arrived back home and I was able to drive home in the dark.  I was so grateful for that!!! 

CELEBRATION MY 73rd & TIMOTHY’S 41st BIRTHDAY

One of my favorite times of year is to spend time with my son, Timothy, whom I love dearly. I often tell folks there is something special about a BOY and his Mom!  Tim bring delight to my face whether it’s in person or on the telephone.  He is a Mighty Man of Valor!!!
August 19th at 6:00 a.m. we caught the Amtrak Train from Dearborn - Business Class, to downtown Chicago. It was a pleasure to just sit next to Timothy and listen to him breathe.    We slept and shared treats, talked and read the newspaper. Limited use of phones.
After four hours we arrived in Chicago - I was with Timothy so how we got around and what we did from there was a walk of faith.  However, we did get a taxi from Grand Central Station to Hyde Park where President Obama grew up and a restaurant with down home cooking was served.  Besides enjoying the food, it was where Deborah Diane lives.  I knew she had some deadlines to meet because the News were off the hook, and folks were pulling for her time to write stories about many of the events.  However, she did break away to come and meet us.
The expression on Tim and Debbie’s face to greet each other was a sight for sore eyes.  It’s nothing like a mother seeing her children love each other.  I finally met Lynn a friend of Debbie that I had heard so much about as she worked in the barber shop where President Obama got his hair cut and she insisted that I come in and see the roped off chair with his photo over it.  I was glad to meet and pray for Lynn and she was happy to meet me too.  That was awesome!
Debbie called UBER for ride downtown - I enjoyed talking to driver and Timothy taught me something interesting that I put into practice.  First of all I am NOT a big tipper. Tim suggested that since I am sharing Jesus let the tip reflect that.  That was interesting, so I did give drive a big tip.  I will remember that for future when tipping.  (If I talk about Jesus, reflect Jesus in my tip).  GOT IT!!!
We went shopping and ate early dinner at Water Tower where we could order any kind of food we desired including International.  Afterward, we made our way back to Central Station for our ride back home. Tim did not want public transportation, so I, yes, ME thumbed down a cab (just like when my Dad thumbed a ride to the field, precious memories – NOT)!!!  While there my youngest brother, Jerome, came down to see us.  He looked quite well and we were happy to see him.  Jerome thought it was a big deal that we came to Chicago on Train for one day and going back same day – he thought that was a RICH folk move.
What I enjoyed about the trip most of all was the company and I absolutely had an enjoyable time, as I was all there.  I will have NO regrets when I look back.  Yes Indeed, I created another memory.  This was one of the best events of my life for 2017 and I thank my Heavenly Father for He provided it all.  Thanks Timothy for sharing this auspicious occasion with me.  

Open Letter to Friend

Wow! The art of letter writing has changed significantly, as they are doing new things in this process.  Oh me, oh my!  I am writing you as I thought it would be a good way to communicate even if it’s old fashioned.  It’s been a long time, nevertheless, here I am!
I just read your thank you note and appreciate you taking the time to write it, you had thanked me by phone and that was good for me, yet you went another step. Thank you.  We are different, but different is good and we can learn from each other.  You are always leading in your grand leadership style.
Last night I read over your rebuke to me regarding how I felt about President Donald Trump that caused you great concern.  You said you heard no one express hate toward the man, as I did toward the President.  I used the word HATE because that is the strongest language I know to use. I stand by MY feelings, as they are my own.  What you all said at a Sister to Sister’s meeting was deeply troubling.  That was why I removed my physical body from the room you all were chatting about at that time, into another room where only one other person was sitting.  We looked at each other and shook our heads.  Shortly afterward, I left. No one bothered to ask me why I left and no one asked me why I did not return.  I hold no bitterness as I grieved the loss of that fellowship and wish all the sisters’ well that was in the discussion.  Now not all were present, but the ones that were there said plenty.  I accept their opinion as their own, I just disagreed with how they expressed themselves about the CEO of America in a fellowship meeting. (It would have been okay sitting around kitchen table, but with other different points of views there, it was rude – at best, especially at that occasion).
As for me, I go to my Heavenly Father and tell him how I feel, like I do any other sin that I commit, I ask him to remove this defect of character in me and until He does, I generally will start off a public conversation when I am asked to speak on something he has done or said, I let them know I may not be the best person to ask because I come from the primacy that I HATE his behavior as he is so un-presidential.  Then I will ask them, do they want me to continue. (I speak often in public and that subject comes up in diverse settings, I speak MY mind).  They all want to know what’s on my mind.  While charity requires only two things from me, be patient and be kind.  I strive for both.  This brought to mind when my youngest daughter, Carletta attended Renaissance High School, she didn’t like it there and begged me to remove her from 9th grade. She was traumatized and cried everyday not to return to that school.  She shared her experience with me and at that point I HATED that school, what is was doing to my child and to our household? I was head of household, as her dad had just died, and now I had to step up to the plate to provide and protect her. Didn’t know what I was doing, but I did my best.  I went to school, after much prayer, to disenroll her and as I was signing papers the Principal came out to challenge me asking me, why are you taking her out, so many parents are waiting to get their children in? Mom you are making a big mistake, why are you doing this? The only answer I could muster up is, because I HATE this school and I am taking her out.  She continued to talk, HATE is a strong word, and you should never use that word. I looked at her eye ball to eye ball and told her Ms. Principal, I HATE Renaissance High School and my child is leaving.  At that point, she said okay. It would have been good if she had sat down and had a conversation with me before she decided to lecture me. She knew NOTHING about my family nor the dynamics of my family.  I do NOT regret expressing myself to her, as that was the strongest thing I could think of, and I do not regret removing Carletta.  (I don’t hate the school today).
All I know right here, right now is we are all broken, but in different places and Jesus is not only my Savior He is my Lord, yes, He is the boss of me. I talk to Him and tell him where I am – I have a relationship with Him. I tell him the truth about me and the world I live in then I can accept the truth He speaks to me and He said this to me when I expressed myself to him about our current President:  “I am sovereign over even those who are seemingly invincible. Ernestine you can be confident that MY power and justice will one day conquer ALL evil.  Ultimately justice will be served in the world. I, God, will settle all accounts. Disobedience, rebellion and injustice will not prevail but will be punished severely by my righteousness for I am a HOLY God, who rules over all the earth.  I rest in the comfort of knowing THIS, and only THIS! (Things President Trump does and says affects the LIVES of helpless/seemingly hopeless folks that don’t have strength to rise above nor strength to pray).
My Heavenly Father is not moved by my expression of hate, He knows me, He understands me, and He is the only one that can transform me. He knows I will do as Mary the Mother of Jesus told the disciples, whatever He says, DO IT!!!  I know HIM for MYSELF, and not for another.  Your journey is yours, mine is mine, both of us are leaders, just different leadership styles and different ways of expression, can we just have mutual respect for each other and strive to see another perspective without calling it GIBBERISH?!  Glad we could talk, and I left the conversation that the devil didn’t get the victory as wherever there is confusion the enemy of our souls has a hand in it, as for me, I refuse to be a tool for the devil to use.
Thanking God for you and your testimony and the faith you have in God, only wish one day I can attain to your status.  May God continual blessing be upon you as you press forward to the high calling in Christ Jesus, for at the end of the day pleasing and being loyal to Him is all that matters, isn’t it?
It’s okay to confront, without being confrontational.  God calls us to peace, I rest in His peace!!!
I Remain, Your Friend,
Ernie

P. S. Have always admired you, I still do!  GREATER IS COMING!!!